Women Want To Be Picked Up
It’s important to understand that women want you to pick them up, they want you to seduce them. They want to be swept off their feet. Every woman out there who is single wants an attractive man to come around, charm her and ultimately seduce her.
You need to understand that women aren’t mean or bitchy naturally. They rarely take pleasure in shooting down men’s advances.
They just have to be picky.
I call this concept the “She’s rooting for you” concept. It’s the idea that the whole time you’re trying to pick her up, in the back of her head, she’s cheering you on. She wants you to make her laugh. She wants you to make all the right moves. But she’s not willing to settle for a guy who doesn’t do it for her.
In this way, knowing how to pick up women is kind of a team activity. It’s her job to convey what she’s looking for and present feedback on how you’re making her feel.
It’s your job to initiate each phase of the interaction and move things forward. Ultimately, you both have the same goal — to meet and fall for somebody that you’re crazy about. But there’s no faking it.
Know What You Want and Knowing What She Wants
I call this dynamic “screening.” As you proceed to interact with her and try to pick her up, she’s checking to see if you register with what she’s looking for in a man. Women tend to do this based on their emotions.
But it’s important that you do this as well. If you’re looking for a girlfriend, then you need to screen each woman you approach and talk to for criteria that you look for in a girlfriend.
For instance, if it’s very important to you that a woman is well-educated, then you may want to make a point of talking about what schools you went to when you first meet her. This way, you’ll be able to weed out the ones you won’t be interested in very quickly.
This is why it’s important to think about, as a man, what you’re looking for in a woman. That way you can cater your time and effort around choosing who to pursue and who to pass up on.
Conversation Starters
The most fundamental aspect of picking up women is starting a conversation with them. This is the bane of many men’s dating life… “what do I say to her?”
The short answer is, well, you can say pretty much anything. But I realize that doesn’t help you too much.
For conversation starters, I like to keep things simple. Maybe pretending to ask for directions or for good local bars is a good place to start if you’re not used to picking up women you’ve never met.
Some guys get too fancy or elaborate. I think this is unnecessary. The goal of a conversation starter is just that: to start the conversation, not bedazzle her in three seconds or less. A lot of men spend a lot of time fretting over something witty or enchanting to say to a woman.
This almost always backfires. Not only does it never come out nearly as cool or suave as it does in your head. But it indicates that you care too much, and that you lack confidence.
Knowing If She Likes You
Another integral part knowing how to pick up women is knowing when she likes you or not.
Here’s the basic rule of thumb: “Would she do what she did if I wasn’t here?”
Apply that to all of her behavior, and you’ll begin to get a glimpse of the signals women are signaling you.
For instance, does she scoot her chair over near you? Well, she sure as hell wouldn’t do that if you weren’t there or if she didn’t have any interest in you. Does she order another drink while you’re talking? Does she flip her hair and lick her lips?
These are all signs and actions that women only do if they’re in the presence of a man that they’re at least interested in. I know it may sound like a lot to stop and analyze every little thing that she does, but once you’ve done it a bit, you’ll begin to notice all of these signs automatically as they occur.
Through Friends or By Cold Approach
There’s a wide difference between picking up women through friends and groups that you’re a part of and picking them up by approaching them out of the blue.
For starters, when you meet women through mutual friends or groups that you’re a part of, there’s already an established level of comfort. She’s seen you around, she’s seen you interact with other people, she knows you have some mutual interest or friendship that she has. Already, you’re a step head in the game. This is how most men meet new women, and this is why it’s definitely the easiest way to pick up women.
Cold approaching on the other hand, you have to manufacture a lot of that rapport and commonality out of thin air… and often you have to do it very quickly.
This is why cold approaching women — be it on the street, in a bar, in a club, or whatever — is a skill that requires quite a bit of repetition and knowledge to get good at.
It’s important to understand though, that ANY woman you see in your day-to-day life has potential. Once you know how to approach any woman, your possibilities are absolutely endless. This is why it’s such a crucial habit to develop.
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