Hello, I read this thread on another forum so I decided to ask you guys whats your thaoughts about it and how to avoid getting into a similar position, which Im kinda afraid of.[/quote] I feel the people on here seems to be most realitygrounded so yeah, thats why. This guy posted:

Quote:I started this pick up shit back in 2006 with David D's mastery program. Within weeks I was Big Pimpin. Not only cold approach but also social circles. Very good. Lays, girls running up and giving me
their numbers, girls escalating on me etc. Got deeper into the scene of PUA and now I'm a nervous wreck. I learned waaaaay too much and now I'm stuck in my head. My initial success was
phenomenal because I knew very very little about pick up. I hated the tactics and was only really in it for inner game. I took on the belief that all girls want me and I understood it soooooo deeply
that I just ran with it. After that shit was effortless...almost every girl started loving me. My fatal error was thinking I "needed more" knowlege. Big mistake. I should have just abandoned the
community and just went on with my life. I had found the vibe in myself but now I lost it.

I realize now looking back that most of the shit I learned in PUA just puts me in my head. Back then, I didn't KNOW logically what was going on, but I knew some of the very important things
instinctually. All I needed was to take on the belief "all women want me" and boom...it was on like donkey kong. Of course, when you have such a delusional belief...things are very good
because you only see what you want to see.

I'm like a robot, I just want that guy who first got into this to come back. Any recommendations?

I have The Blueprint but to be honest, I don't want any more concepts to think about. I don't want that shit. I just want to learn to be normal again while still being really good with chicks. Even
Owen Cook said that it's just sign posts toward a certain way of being, I want that beingness in me once more. It's in there. Just can't find it.

I think a huge problem that the community has is that it raises the bar WAY too high on how perfect everything has to be for you to get success. MM and the like (and especially, especially Mehow) raise the bar way too high on how good your outer game has to be. It gives the impression that unless everything you say is the perfectly calibrated routine, you get blown out. Natural game guys (and especially, especially RSD) give you the impression that your inner game has to be perfect or you will get blown out. You have to accept that you aren't going to get every girl, it's not a matter of executing certain steps perfectly or being 100% congruent (whatever the hell that means). You are not going to get close to every girl, but its not because of bad technique or bad inner game, it's because there is randomness.

Realize that when pick up guys try to present this idea of perfection, its illusory, and just filter that out of whatever you read/hear. You should be fine other than that.

Also, even aside from that, there's no reason to read a ton of ebooks and products. Even if they won't fuck with your head the truth is most of them aren't very good anyway. Read Models, and when you want to improve, just go approach more, don't buy more products.

I guess you should reconnect start to reconnect "socially" and chill out with people who are just happy in their life without the need to refer constantly to the "game". Also stop reading PU material. Really, it's toxic. Go for much more interesting book which will challenge your own curiosity.

Palf, first understand that getting good at "game" does not require you to change your inherent personality. Cynics, alphas, romantics, aloof guys, emotional guys, dumb jocks, normal dudes, they all get girls. The only common thread is that you assert your desire. Game is about asserting that desire in a way that is comfortable for the other person.

As long as you understand that you don't really have to change your fundamental personality, game will not fuck you up. You don't really have to do certain things to get a girl. You do have to assert your desires though.

The other component to getting consistent results is calibration. The easiest way to get good at calibration is by going out and interacting with people a lot. Essentially game is calibration once you are able to assert your desires.

So don't be reading extraneous PU material which will have you believe that you have to be a certain way to get girls. You don't have to be anything. You do have to ask for what you want in a classy fashion though.

http://www.practicalpickup.com/the-guide-to-a-pua-detox

Although this subject is covered thoroughly in the blog,I have to say that I identify with this guy's situation(until two years before).I found it impossible to escape even when I turned to direct game,that had a similar effect on me.
At the end,was just random comfortable situations that helped me getting over it.( being so much in my mind).
And especially that program "mastery",I think it was one of the greatest inner game self help programs for me,you can find many good advices about how to evolve and all that stuff,but I wouldnt touch it now,because it could turn to a terrible mental masturbation

I'm sure other people are having the same experience the more and more they go out. Most of us probably need to stop intellectualizing so much. One of my closest friends is a natural and he's lost count of how many women he has slept with. When we go out he simply sees an attractive woman and without thinking he goes and talks to her. That's it, and he get laid like a rockstar. It's probably better to improve your life to live an amazing life rather than improving your life for the sole purpose of getting women.

One thing that I've noticed with guys, and that was true with myself, is that taking 1-2 month periods once a year where you don't think about women, don't approach women, don't care about anything dating-related and just focus on work or your hobbies, is always very, very healthy. Guys who do this seem to always come back and improve quickly.

(10-02-2011 03:23 PM)Mark Wrote:  One thing that I've noticed with guys, and that was true with myself, is that taking 1-2 month periods once a year where you don't think about women, don't approach women, don't care about anything dating-related and just focus on work or your hobbies, is always very, very healthy. Guys who do this seem to always come back and improve quickly.

I did this earlier this year with excellent results. Sometimes it helps just to force your brain to take a break and detox from the addictive rush of pursuing women whether you're succeding or not. Towards the end of this period I had women approaching me in bars and ended up dating a very attractive woman who made her interest very obvious.

It comes down to internal/external validation again. The more you chase, the more externally validated you'll be. Stop chasing for a while and shut that dynamic down and women will start to pay more attention to you.

I'm about to do this again myself as a reset.

Yes, very true about the internal/external validation thing. Guys ask me all the time, "how do I become internally validated?" It's by doing things for YOURSELF that YOU are proud of, and nobody else necessarily. Whether it's losing 10 lbs, learning a song on the guitar, going camping alone for a week, whatever... it's doing stuff for you. It's a healthy sense of selfishness.

I've noticed that I naturally fall in and out of these breaks now without really thinking about it.

I've only gone out three times in the last two months. But before that I went out 3-4 nights a week for about four months. Then before that I was on/off for a few months, and before that I went out a lot for a few months. Eventually you just learn to pay attention to what feels right and follow your moods.