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Could reading PU Material kill your vulnerability?
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Symor Offline
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Post: #1
Could reading PU Material kill your vulnerability?
I have this idea in my mind for one week,because recently that I read Marks blog and talk about the new stuff,with some friends, from an enlightening it turned to become another more mental masturbation for me.
I find the idea of being vulnerable one of the most fundamental that you have to deal.It protects you from your "ego bodyguard",your "self esteem cop" ,that never lets you take part in risky situations.
The one reason that I was always reading too much,was -,at long term- an avoidance,analyze more,and (mistakenly) trying to "get it" more.
The other was that I wanted to protect my ego as much as possible,so I tried desperately not to make any mistake,according to what the P.U taught me,and not what I really wanted to do. But the "ego protector" was still on ,infield,this time with the form "I know more things now,so nobody can hurt me",of course I wasn't really risking anything ,and I wasn't vulnerable,because I was trying things that I considered safe,no matter that some of them,seemed a little frustrating for me.
And this kept my mind more more,PU-depended instead of self-depended.
After that was always something that hit me,and I needed new ideas,to play with my mind,instead of seeing reality.
So I think thatif a guy wants to succeed being himself and vulnerable,needs to get away from P.U books,blogs,forum,big conversations ,and starts putting himself in new situations,until he gets that feeling of being out of his mind.
Then he can choose freely, and not with the insecurity,that he needs something more to succeed.
(This post was last modified: 08-29-2011 10:41 PM by Symor.)
08-29-2011 10:33 PM
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Ravla Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Could reading PU Material kill your vulnerability?
It's not what you do, it's the intention...

But you already knew that, right? Wink
You are now aware of that. What do plan to do? Pulling off of PU world is fine, if it works for you, but won't help if you look elsewhere for solace.
08-29-2011 11:13 PM
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shadow Offline
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Post: #3
RE: Could reading PU Material kill your vulnerability?
I don't think reading PU material has anything to do with being vulnerable. Well it does in some ways, but let me try and explain my perspective as best as possible.

When you start out, there are prior established emotional patterns that are difficult to break. In fact, you may not even be aware of them. Reading Pu material makes
U aware of these patterns. For example, in my world view giving sexual eye contact, getting close etc. did not exist until I read 60 yoc. Being able to do this was out of question for me. Why? I didn't know it was possible. So reading Pu material definitely helped me integrate a new aspect into my personality.

Typically with any new skill, and make no mistake PU is skill, there is a conscious phase. Eventually, it will integrate unto ur world view. I think ur problem may have to do with perfectionism. I was this way and still am. I was constantly looking for a magic bullet. Jumping from book to DVD to audio, I believed that I just had to learn more to get better. In reality, I just needed to learn a bit and practice a lot. A large part of it was also an impatience for results. I still have this problem to some extent. If a few sets don't go well I'm already changing my gameplan. When u start out, you don't want to change things unless u have tried out the new plan on atleast 100 sets.

I kinda lost my flow a little bit. So the post has become a hodge podge. Feel free to ask for
Clarification if u disagree or don't find something clear.
08-30-2011 02:59 AM
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Jon Offline
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Post: #4
RE: Could reading PU Material kill your vulnerability?
I think this is definitely a problem that some guys have. I know that reading pick up material can give a guy a sense of satisfaction that he is "doing something" without forcing him to push himself outside his comfort zone. Of course, it can provide useful information as well, so what I would say is as long as you are going out, doing approaches, and pushing yourself, it's fine. I know brad p said somewhere that everybody should do two hours in field for every hour of material they consume. That makes a lot of sense to me.
(This post was last modified: 08-30-2011 06:51 AM by Jon.)
08-30-2011 06:50 AM
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Symor Offline
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Post: #5
RE: Could reading PU Material kill your vulnerability?
I agree with all the replies above.
I dont have a definite answer,and I dont want to make it seem like it is something complicated.
I remeber a comment of a good friend that he prefers to use canned material instead of his normal attitude,because then he 'ld have someone to blame.
Things have changed a lot now,especially with blogs like this,it wpuld'nt be easy for someone to charge at Mark his failure,because what he teaches is not based on techniques and canned material.
The only problem I wanted to adress is when you can't just be what you want to be,and you are putting a PU persona to protect yourself (for example fake alpha like mark wrote).You are not vulnerable at this time.You just read you have to be alpha or cocky and funny,or aloof,and trying to be that because you think that if you let yourself free you will seem another wussy-needy guy,just like in past.
08-31-2011 03:05 AM
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shadow Offline
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Post: #6
RE: Could reading PU Material kill your vulnerability?
Symor, I think it is much better to start with outer game than vague inner game advice like "be vulnerable". It doesn't mean much because ur being vulnerable to your own emotional programming when you behave a certain way. To imbibe the right attitudes is a process of eliminating mental programming that holds you back. This requires "doing" some new behaviors. What ends up happening with some people is they never integrate these behaviors and it always remains an act. Only by taking consistent action pushing one outside their comfort zone is growth possible. Most people dont have the emotional detachment and flexibility to take a pure inner game route to improvement.

Let me give you an analogy to show you where I'm coming from. Imagine a young starry eyed student who wants to learn swordsmanship. He seeks out a great swordsman hardened by a thousand battles. Challengers quake with terror at the mere mention of this warrior-teacher's name. When the student asks the master what he needs to do to improve at swordsmanship, the master says, "Your sword must become an extension of your arm. Your sword and you have to be united in perfect harmony. The sword must become part of your soul. Your intention must be channeled through the sword". Imagine the student's predicament. He has no actionable advice. He does not feel one with his sword. In fact he doesn't even understand what that means. So how does the student go about becoming a master swordsman with this advice?

Such advice totally makes sense for somebody who is already good. It provides a great ideal to strive for. But it is not actionable and thus not easy to adopt to improve
(This post was last modified: 08-31-2011 07:26 AM by shadow.)
08-31-2011 06:57 AM
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Mark Offline
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Post: #7
RE: Could reading PU Material kill your vulnerability?
Shadow's right... "Being Vulnerable" is not necessarily an actionable goal by itself. Rather it's background knowledge that should inform everything you do.

If you're a newbie, the first step is to approach a couple times. Focus everything on that. Then once you're actually able to stop a girl and talk to her for a second, take it from there.

The Conclusion in the book lays out a brief outline of actions you can take and in which order.

Models - A Comprehensive Guide to Attracting Women
G3 Program - Step-by-step interactive coaching program -- takes you from A-to-Z with women.
(This post was last modified: 08-31-2011 01:11 PM by Mark.)
08-31-2011 01:10 PM
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