Last night I had an Internet date with a woman and I pulled her back to my apartment. No cleverness was needed, i.e. rather than saying something like "I need to show you that painting back at my place" my escalation was direct. At each stage, I simply told her I wanted to spend more time doing what we were doing before moving her to the next location (first it was the doorway to a closed shop, then my car, then my place). Back at my place she enjoyed being tongued down and groped through her clothes (though not in the most risque manner) but when it came to escalating further, she wouldn't even let me lift her bra up.

Whenever women are DTF on the first date I don't worry about ethics because it's clear that they know what they're getting (likely, casual sex). Even if they're thinking I might be boyfriend material, they're going to be perfectly fine with just being fucked casually if that's what it turns out to be. If a woman gets naked on the first date but won't fuck, I'm only slightly concerned about ethics when I'm scheduling the second date, because I figure there's still a decent chance she's okay with the idea of herself having casual sex, but perhaps can't completely overcome her anti-slut programming, or just needs more familiarity with a man to be fully turned on. However in a case like last night I have concerns. How likely is it that a woman who won't even let her breasts be exposed will be okay with a casual relationship? In my experience it's not likely. I'm here to seduce women and have fun without hurting people, not ruin the process of dating for them.

In the past, to get around this problem I've employed (with some success) the technique of telling a woman that I'm just not tamable enough to be an honest-to-goodness boyfriend to anyone, but I'm really enjoying hanging out with her. That's hit or miss and depends on the kinds of conversation we're having (with the woman last night, I couldn't find a way to start hinting at that).

What do you all think? Bother with a second date with a woman like this or just move on to find a woman clearly DTF?

So let me get this straight..you WANT her to be a slut? If a woman wanted to have sex with me on the first date, she'd be written off. It's not "anti-slut defence" or whatever PUA term it's been coined with. It's called having morals. Jeez louise. This shouldn't be a put-off, it should be a big flashing neon sign that says 'KEEPER'.

I guess if you're just looking to fuck and chuck girls, then yeah, sluts are what you're after. It seems like this woman isn't. But if she's hot enough to worth working on (go through a few more dates or a few months of seeing her) to sleep with, then put the effort in.

It still boggles my mind how this can be seen as a bad thing, though. Damn ..

Davey, knock it off with the preaching, and stop calling women sluts.

@Tim - you don't need to go into a whole song and dance about how you can't be tamed. Just say "I don't want a girlfriend" at some point in the interaction, and you are good to go. If you tell her that and she still wants to see you, it's good to go. You can't overcome her "programming" if she only wants a boyfriend, though. Just respect it and move on.

(06-24-2011 05:33 AM)Jon Wrote:  Davey, knock it off with the preaching, and stop calling women sluts.

Jon, call a spade a spade.

(06-24-2011 06:24 AM)DaveyDrama Wrote:  

(06-24-2011 05:33 AM)Jon Wrote:  Davey, knock it off with the preaching, and stop calling women sluts.

Jon, call a spade a spade.

Slut isn't a neutral term. It implies there's something wrong with having sex on the first date (as opposed to everything right).

(06-24-2011 06:55 AM)Jon Wrote:  Slut isn't a neutral term. It implies there's something wrong with having sex on the first date (as opposed to everything right).

Oi. lol. Maybe we should open another thread to debate that topic. What was this one about again?

(06-24-2011 05:17 AM)DaveyDrama Wrote:  ... It's not "anti-slut defence" or whatever PUA term it's been coined with. It's called having morals. ...

I guess if you're just looking to fuck and chuck girls, then yeah, sluts are what you're after. It seems like this woman isn't. But if she's hot enough to worth working on (go through a few more dates or a few months of seeing her) to sleep with, then put the effort in.

It sure sounds like you're saying that morality is important to you, and at the same time you're advising me to put in whatever *deceptive* effort is needed in order to fuck a woman who wouldn't agree to it if she knew my true terms and conditions.

Right now I'm looking for women who want to slut it up with me. I'd marry a woman with a history of that without a second thought if it was a great match. Perhaps I'm foolish, but I don't think it indicates that a woman would be substantially more likely to cheat or leave me (but I wouldn't get married to a woman wasn't waaay into me for a reasonable period of time, with ups and downs.)

(06-24-2011 07:37 AM)Tim9000 Wrote:  It sure sounds like you're saying that morality is important to you, and at the same time you're advising me to put in whatever *deceptive* effort is needed in order to fuck a woman who wouldn't agree to it if she knew my true terms and conditions.

lol easy there Charlie. You misunderstood what I meant. If she's not gonna give it up to you right away but she's willing to stick around, then put the effort in if she's hot enough. That's what I was sayin.

Quote: I'd marry a woman with a history of that without a second thought if it was a great match. Perhaps I'm foolish, but I don't think it indicates that a woman would be substantially more likely to cheat or leave me (but I wouldn't get married to a woman wasn't waaay into me for a reasonable period of time, with ups and downs)

To each their own, my friend, but past behaviour is the best indicator of future behaviour. I just don't like the thought of my girlfriend having 1000 different dicks in her. I'd be really conflicted if I fell for a girl who had a bad history, so just be careful dude

What about if a girl brought home about 50 guys, makeouts with them but completely refuse to let their dick into her pussy. Is she more pure? LOL

lol...