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Well its a confidence issue if you do not try. I have tried ALOT. So for me its not a confidence issue and to be honest I am sick and tired of every guy using the confidence issue thing as some kind of penicillin that can cure every cold and cancer. Its not. Believe me if you have truly lived life, its not. If a guy is trying, its not confidence per say, its technique or reality I would think. Its like, what if you have a product to sell and you have tried advertising, PR, sales people and every avenue but you cannot sell the product. You have total confidence in your product but you cannot sell it. Its not a confidence issue, its a problem that needs some wisdom and technique help.

I have been sold a bunch of goods by other products (not Mark's) that tell you "oh younger women lover older men." Well I am around alot of younger women with work and play and I do not see that at all. Never have. Hence my questions...

So in earnest can any body help? What do I do? I am very attracted to them and keep myself in good shape and look young but when the age thing is brought up I have trouble - real trouble not "confidence" trouble.

Sorry to be longwinded, but I need the help. So anybody have anything that can help?
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The best information I've got about this issue is in the book: Date Young Women for men over 35 by R. Don Steele. Almost everything he says in the book has happened to me. I'm 38 y-o hitting on 21-24 y-o girls, no sex with them so far but I'm getting better and better. You can't find information in the book about building comfort and creating an emotional connection with the girl, which I think is very important because the girl is gonna be scared because of the age gap, and he doesn't talk about shit-tests and believe me, young girls are gonna test you constantly, they wnat to know if you are the real deal.
What can you expect from young girls? A LOT of games: playing hard to get, scheduling games, phone tag, ignoring you, etc. They are girls that's what they know to do, so don't take it personally and don't let them play with your time or disrespect you in any way, thay are expecting an STRONG man so act accordingly, don't take any of her shit. You don't have to act like a jerk but set your boundaries in a clear way.
Don't think because she's young she's gonna make your life a paradise, they are immature, no experience in life, don't put them on a pedestal or you are gonna start from a bad position.
You really have to learn to be unreactive, they are gona be testing you constantly.
You have to be patient, it takes time, they are scared, they can be attracted to you but they are scared. It's a new situation for them. Therefore deal with your social circle, cold approach is not gonna work.
The bright side about this? When you deal with women, passing their tests, playing along when they play hard to get (without letting them disrespect you in any way), etc. It's a piece of cake. For me dealing with women in their 30s is really easy. Young girls are a lot harder.
I hope this helps.

Quote:A LOT of games: playing hard to get, scheduling games, phone tag, ignoring you, etc.

I think the difference between you and I is that I don't take these things personally. I don't see them as games because I strongly believe that 95% of the time she's not doing it intentionally. They're just girls being flaky and changing their mind and forgetting things. You can't expect her to return every phone call she ever gets from a guy, she'd be sitting on the phone 24/7.

It's not about you. It's not intentional. It's just how they are.

(04-09-2011 07:16 AM)Mark Wrote:  

Quote:A LOT of games: playing hard to get, scheduling games, phone tag, ignoring you, etc.

I think the difference between you and I is that I don't take these things personally. I don't see them as games because I strongly believe that 95% of the time she's not doing it intentionally. They're just girls being flaky and changing their mind and forgetting things. You can't expect her to return every phone call she ever gets from a guy, she'd be sitting on the phone 24/7.

It's not about you. It's not intentional. It's just how they are.

?????

Quote: Leo wrote:
What can you expect from young girls? A LOT of games: playing hard to get, scheduling games, phone tag, ignoring you, etc. They are girls that's what they know to do, so don't take it personally

What I'm saying is, calling it a "game" implies that they actually care and are actually consciously doing something. They're not playing games. It's very, very rare that I'll meet a girl who KNOWINGLY plays games with me. 9 times out of 10, if they're flaky, it's because they just don't care or don't like you that much.

Hmmmm, it seems that lately we're seeing things in a total different way. Not all women play games, I've met women that are VERY obvious about their attraction toward me and they show it without reserve, some of them even call me or suggest the date. But some other women play games, they even have confessed that to me, being hard to get the most common game. It has happened to me with women of different ages, from girls in their early 20s to women in their 30s. They really believe that you are more interested in what you can't have so easily.
Some sources that you can check that say or suggest women to play games:

http://www.helium.com/knowledge/220901-s...ard-to-get

http://www.hardtoget.com/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hRQMAXO-h6Y&feature=fvst

http://seduction-guides.com/why-women-play-hard-get/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_rules

IDK, for me the games that women play are very common, I just read their BL to see if they are interested or not and I play dumb and along and I get the girl. I think that playing games is not a sign that she doesn't like you that much it's just that women have a lot of fears and they feel more comfortable if they play games. I've had women that were playing games with me proposing later on, so that's a proof that they were interested. Just my 2 cents.

(04-10-2011 03:48 AM)Mark Wrote:  What I'm saying is, calling it a "game" implies that they actually care and are actually consciously doing something. They're not playing games. It's very, very rare that I'll meet a girl who KNOWINGLY plays games with me. 9 times out of 10, if they're flaky, it's because they just don't care or don't like you that much.

I dont think most girls are aware of what they are doing
Thats why a lot of girls who find the PU community stick around because they learn a lot about themselves and why they do this stuff

(04-10-2011 05:13 AM)Lycan Wrote:  I dont think most girls are aware of what they are doing
Thats why a lot of girls who find the PU community act disgusted and say "That would never work on me!"

Fixed your post.

Again Leo, the major difference here if girls are playing games, that assumes that they care to that degree. In my experience, girls who are flaky or play "hard to get" are not playing games. They just don't care. A girl can be totally into you one night, and then two days later not remember who you are or care.

Again, that's where comfort and connection come in. Girls don't fuck with guys they respect and feel like they know on a personal level.

I almost never meet girls who play games. And the few times I do, I usually ditch them on the spot, which ironically makes them want me more... and stop playing games.

(04-10-2011 12:25 PM)Mark Wrote:  Again, that's where comfort and connection come in. Girls don't fuck with guys they respect and feel like they know on a personal level.

This could be the explanation of what's happening to me. I think that building comfort and creating an emotional connection are the most vague concepts in PU, and everybody says that the game is played in comfort but NOBODY explains how the hell you can do it. Even Mystery says to babysit the girl, but what the hell he wants to say about that? I read the book that you recommend to build comfort: How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie, and well in a nutshell I'd say that I learned that you have to care about people, pay attention to them and express your care about them. When I try to create an emotional connection with a woman I try to read her in an emotional level: why she's acting like that, why she's defensive, fearful or any other trait that usually guys don't pay attention about it and if they think I'm right thay get impressed and what to get to know me better. Well, this is a process, here is where I'm right now and it's working in this way for me. I hope in the future I can improve my game about how to build comfort and create an emotional connection to have an easier interaction with a woman.