Fuck that. Do it alone. Your strong enough.

Get approaching. No crutches. No excuses.

Start with just complimenting like her shoes or her scarf or something. Once you feel OK with that, then tell them they're cute.

And shit, Amsterdam is one of the best day game cities on the planet. You're very lucky.

I will do another serious attempt at daygame tomorrow (wednesday). Meaning that I hereby promise to go outside tomorrow and not go back inside until I´ve at least had some real interaction with girls, and will do my very best to either do direct approach or compliment a woman in some way.

Cheers!

Or just read Mark's latest post:
http://www.practicalpickup.com/improving-quickly
Some good ideas in there about starting small.

Oh and go for the warm-up rejection!

Thanks for the link. I actually did ask the guy at the gym how his day was going. I think it's a bit less common to ask that in Dutch than in English. I felt awkward but it went fine. Then I wanted to ask my bus driver too, but it seemed so unusual that I chickened out! If I find I'm still unable to compliment girls etc. in the next few days, I am adopting the exercises from the blogpost.

Philip i had the same translation problem
I think its something you actually do ask others in america

I used how is it going ( how are you feeling) instead

(04-14-2011 06:41 AM)Lycan Wrote:  Philip i had the same translation problem
I think its something you actually do ask others in america

I used how is it going ( how are you feeling) instead

Yes, that would be 100x more normal to ask. I don't know if Mark says to ask how the day is going because it's 'scarier' than just asking how people are doing, or that it's all pretty much the same in the US.

Edit: Actually, in Dutch you'd ask something like "How is it (going)?" or "Is all well?".

I'm just going to use this thread as a sort of journal.

I went outside to "approach" again today. On the upside, I bought some groceries I needed. On the downside, I was saddened because I saw some girls that were just stupid-beautiful, and I couldn't approach them. I know now that I have to gradually work my way up to cold approach by doing Mark's exercises.

Before, I've actually gone out and ask people the time. I remember it was really scary for me a year ago. Now, I still hate it when I actually know the time, or when I have my phone with me that has the time on it, or when you can see the time outside somewhere nearby. When I actually need to know the time I can ask it fear-free, but once I ask it when I don't actually need to know it I don't feel comfortable anymore, because I feel it's not "normal" and not congruent or something.

At first I rationalized to myself that it's stupid to ask the time when you don't actually need to know it. But after thinking about it some more, if I can't ask a girl the time when I don't need to know it, can I then tell her I think she's cute and that I want her number? Or to put it in reverse, if I get to the point where I can easily cold approach girls everywhere, wouldn't asking the time be a fucking cakewalk?

So, conclusion, I rationalized shit again and convinced myself that for some reason it's okay to be too afraid to ask the time when I don't actually need to know it. But now I see it as a challenge: if I can ask the time at any time and be totally comfortable with it, then I know I have shed some of my anxiety and I can go on to the next step and desensitize further.

good going philip

(04-14-2011 06:49 AM)Philip Wrote:  

(04-14-2011 06:41 AM)Lycan Wrote:  Philip i had the same translation problem
I think its something you actually do ask others in america

I used how is it going ( how are you feeling) instead

Yes, that would be 100x more normal to ask. I don't know if Mark says to ask how the day is going because it's 'scarier' than just asking how people are doing, or that it's all pretty much the same in the US.

Edit: Actually, in Dutch you'd ask something like "How is it (going)?" or "Is all well?".

I think the point is to just be more comfortable with asking strangers normal stuff

Yeah I got that twinge too when I was out getting comfortable in day stuff.
I played a trick on myself. I actually asked directions to somewhere I geniunly didnt know the direction to. Its kinda hard to find somewhere you dont know in your own city but you can dig deep for the sake of some cuties!
Also what with mobile phones etc its really odd not to know the time or to really need to ask someone for it because its that urgent.
I think our doing the right thing. Once you get it in your head that your off out to do this for a few hours you come up with some random ideas.

In the vein of using this thread as a journal I just got off the train and this kinda cute woman gave me some serious eye contact and I held it and gave her a smile. It sounds small but in the scheme of things its kinda huge because although Im comfortable approaching much better looking girls Im obsessed with taking that lead. So who knows more of this kinda stuff might be fun. Certainly less stressful.