I've been reading this stuff awhile but only recently started to actually get off my ass and talk to girls, so while I'm familiar with the literature I'm still quite new to actually executing it. Nonetheless I've been pretty successful so far, I've got 5 girls I met over the past couple months at various bars and night clubs coming around regularly and have started meeting new ones via "day game" lately. The problem though is that I find myself feeling something a lot like guilt...

The girls I've met, are all really sweet and (at least claim) to only have been with two or three guys before me. Normally I wouldn't concern myself overly much with that kind of claim from a 20something year old girl, but I'm living in Taiwan and the dating culture is different here. I get the feeling that they like me but don't have their heads completely wrapped around the fact that I don't ever plan to date them seriously.

To be clear, I've told all of them that I'm not looking for a girlfriend and that they aren't the only girl I'm seeing, and while they hear what I said, I get the feeling they're all hoping that eventually I'll realize I really only want them and will get rid of the rest. I may at some point do just that, but none of the ones I'm seeing now have given me the urge to start a serious relationship, although I do like them and enjoy spending time with them even when between the sheets activities are not involved. On the one hand, these are grownups we're talking about and I'm being quite honest with them, they're old enough to make their own decisions, but on the other hand, I don't want to leave a trail of broken hearts and depressed girls behind me while I enjoy myself.

May or may not be relevant, but Taiwanese girls in general like white guys and since I'm white, decent looking and speak Chinese I have a lot of advantages here, which may be part of why they're willing to put up with this situation.

What do you guys suggest?

http://www.practicalpickup.com/ethics-of-being-a-player

Mark's article is spot on, and I wanted to add this: I realize the culture in Taiwan is somewhat conservative around sex, but it might be that one of the reasons the girls like you is that they know that western guys are more relaxed about relationships than the average Taiwanese guy, and they don't need to worry about being judged by you. These girls might actually actively WANT a casual relationship but avoid it because they are afraid of being judged.

I don't have experience with taiwanese girls, but I have met more than one girl from mainland China who tells me about how conservative everything is back home, and wants me to bone her before she gets on a plane back home where she has to play the good girl.

In my experience..there is no way to avoid hurting girls..and they will hurt you too..not that we mean to..not that they mean to..its just the way it is..you cant have pleasure without pain..

(07-02-2011 11:14 AM)007 Wrote:  In my experience..there is no way to avoid hurting girls..and they will hurt you too..not that we mean to..not that they mean to..its just the way it is..you cant have pleasure without pain..

Well said.

thanks guy, much appreciated.

Honesty is the best policy, for better or worse.

Yeah I have a girl that I am trying to stop seeing but the sex is too good!!! I am not that interested in her though, and while she says she is okay with non-commitment, she is sending off some signals that make me think she is interested in more and I think it might be good to move on, b/c I am more interested in some girls I have met recently that I have barely even gotten to know.

I think I am goign to just say that I am going through a time in my life where I am concentrating on my personal development and I don't think this relationship is going to be right for me right now. I hope i can get up the courage to say that though