Hi

So since we're having a new female member, I'm really curious to hear her toughts on this one.

I think all of us have probably experienced this: we're having great chemistry with a girl, and for some random reason she starts having doubts.

a great example
- after I approached and after our conversation, she said "wow it was really amazing that you came and talked to me". The next day I texted her "hey it was really great talking to you yesterday, I'm gonna call you and then we can hang out some time". She texted back "yeah it was awesome, I had a great time too ". I called the next day, after that she sended me a text "maybe it's that we just leave it like this".

---> in this situation, persistence should have payed off.

- I met this girl on the streets during the daytime when she was there with her friends.
she and her friend came to my party, after that her best friend invited me to her surprise birhtday party. Unfortunately I couldn't be at that party. We have been talking a lot, but it's always on chat. This is because I rarely if ever see her in real life. I know she likes me because else she wouldn't chat with me for 3 hours. I called her this week but she said she was going to be busy etc... Okay I'll give her credit, the exams start next week or so. Most people also don't go out a lot, because they enter exam mindset.

---> Call me arrogant, but I definetly feel that I have a shot with her if I could just see her again in real life. In this situation I believe persistence should pay off.

conclusion: persistence should pay off when she has shown you some initial interest, but for some reason turns cold or changes her mind.

sidenote: all of the above are from cold approach. Although the second is turning more and more into a social circle situation.

your toughts

I agree try again with the second one, but no, when a girl says she doesn't want to see you again after a date, that's pretty much it. Give girl 2 one more try after exams are over.

(05-20-2011 08:48 AM)Jon Wrote:  I agree try again with the second one, but no, when a girl says she doesn't want to see you again after a date, that's pretty much it. Give girl 2 one more try after exams are over.

Yeah I definetly will. But I also think that this goes much deeper. In this post Omari Warren explains that this is just how women work. Take a look back at the example of girl 1. What is different about her second respons? Does this have anything to do with me? No, now I would just ask her out a second time and try again.

You should especially read the comments by some of the women. Very insightfull.

Personally I feel that that this isn't given enough credit, just like direct game.


http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/se....google.be

In the examples Assanova gave, the guy did not get flat out rejected. This girl told you pretty clearly she does not want to see you again. Assanova was talking about dealing with flakes. Continually calling a girl who rejected you is a bad idea and can damage your reputation. Second, the "woman" who comments - only one woman actually posted a comment, is Lady Raine. Read her blog and tell me if you think she's sane or not.

(05-24-2011 03:15 AM)Jon Wrote:  In the examples Assanova gave, the guy did not get flat out rejected. This girl told you pretty clearly she does not want to see you again. Assanova was talking about dealing with flakes. Continually calling a girl who rejected you is a bad idea and can damage your reputation. Second, the "woman" who comments - only one woman actually posted a comment, is Lady Raine. Read her blog and tell me if you think she's sane or not.

dude did you actually read that post?

Just a quick look at the post and this pops up:

"She then said he called, but she didn't bother answering or something along those lines. In short, she said that she didn't go out on a date with him for some stupid reason. Fast forward. All of a sudden, her feelings for him had "

The post is even full of examples like that.....

The least being persistent can do is a great learning experience. I can't really describe it exactly but it are little things:
- at the prom they way she flicked her hair when she was talking to me.
- after talking to me at the prom for like 20 minutes she showed up with
her friend at my party. And she stayed there very long.
- her best friend who invited me to her surprise birthday party.
- how she kept talking to me on chat (which she initiated), it was a totally diferent type of conversation. In the end we talked for 2-3 hours or so.

Would all of this happenned if she didn't like me?

Unfortunately I couldn't show up at that party and I rarely if ever see her in real life.

That's also why I said that I believe I have a shot if I can just get her alone with me.

it's just that 5 minutes of your time to give her a call.

You must understand that I come from a background where women did the work for me. I got approached, they kino'd me, they asked me for the phone number.... So this is a big step forward for me.

Like I said, girl two is worth asking out, but there's no certainty she's into you. All of what you said is consistent with her liking you as a friend. Calling girls who SAY NO will cause you problems in the future.

(05-24-2011 04:33 AM)Jon Wrote:  Like I said, girl two is worth asking out, but there's no certainty she's into you. All of what you said is consistent with her liking you as a friend. Calling girls who SAY NO will cause you problems in the future.

I called her once...

Being consistent with her liking me as a friend. I don't feel that this is the case. Hair flicking consistent with being a friend? Taking secret pictures from me at the prom, being consistent with me being a friend?
Showing up at a party after like 20 minute conversation at a prom, being consistent with being a friend? Keep in mind that she stayed there till very long and had to get up very early in the morning.

We'll see how it goes but I've talked about this with other girls and guys and they've told me the same thing.

Besides i wanted this to be a thread where others guys could share experiences, not an in depth analysis of my experience with one particular girl .

I follow the "three strikes you're out" philosophy. Serves me well. You often get girls on the 2nd or 3rd try. But after that, you're usually wasting your time.

(05-24-2011 06:21 AM)Mark Wrote:  I follow the "three strikes you're out" philosophy. Serves me well. You often get girls on the 2nd or 3rd try. But after that, you're usually wasting your time.

I generally buy that - however I do tend to take a direct "no, I am not interested in another date with you" (which doesn't happen all that often, really) as final.

(05-24-2011 06:21 AM)Mark Wrote:  I follow the "three strikes you're out" philosophy. Serves me well. You often get girls on the 2nd or 3rd try. But after that, you're usually wasting your time.

thx I'll keep it in mind.