Ive heard almost whole my life from 19 (when I started to take care of my looks) that Im hot, good looking etc etc. Ive heard it from atleast 100+ girls (which is kinda alot due to the fact I used to rarely go to clubs), I would say Im still kinda insecure, maybe not in my looks but as a whole as a person.
I find that when I go cocky and funny and use alot of teasing the girls just roll their eyes, some nights ago a girl called me a player, a week ago another girl said "I BET UR A BARTENDER!! UR A BARTENDER RIGHT?? GO HIT ON SOME GIRLS U BARTENDER!", I guess cause of the fact bartenders have a stereotype of being playerish - the funny thing is, Im NOT a player or banging alot of girls, lol, but somehow people tend to think that.
So how would one go about gaming when obviously girls think he's already "playing the field" ?
For your situation, i'd refer you to the segmentation mark uses on his Get A Girlfriend Program. There are basically two forms of attraction passive & active. Passive attraction has more to do with your lifestyle, your looks, body language,... basically things about you aside from the words coming out of it. While Active attraction is what most people would call "game." Thats the teases, roleplays, banter,....
Borrowing from rob judge you pretty much want these two things to be balanced. Thats pretty much how game works. The higher your passive attraction, the less active attraction you need and vice-versa. The example Mark uses alot is if a short-fat guy goes up to a girl in a bar and negs her, " nice nails, are they real? oh well they're cute anyway" it would go over a lot better than if someone like brad pitt said it. If Brad pitt did say that he would probably come off as an asshole.
So for you probably develop alot of passive attraction in women, so they might believe you are out their league. By being cocky funny your just proving to the girls your an asshole when thats not your intention you jsut cant get over your insecurity. You should probably focus more on relating and connecting with a woman with very few classic game "gambits". All the attraction you need should be built up if your handsome. Also statements of sexual intent are a great way to capitalize so the girl knows your into her so that quells her belief that your out of her league.
Hope that helped!
(09-22-2011 11:40 AM)Palf Wrote: [ -> ]So how would one go about gaming when obviously girls think he's already "playing the field" ?
Agree with Poet145x...
Get more sincere. Skip the C+F and instead go for comfort and bonding and connection - do the 'nice guy' thing (but don't overdo it - don't look needy), with a dose of touching in order to let the girl know that you're interested.
Honestly, most of your friends or people you know will say that you're hot. The only way to find out is to post your picture on hotornot.
If you're around 9.0+ then you're consider "above average". If you're 9.9 then your'e hot. Hotornot doesnt lie...it's a bunch of stranger rating you. There's no sugarcoat. and yes, the game is different for those guys who score higher.
Namely, escalate faster and lead.
My friends never told me I was hot... :\
But yeah, what equilibrium said.
I don't know about just hot... but there is a difference if you are really, really, terribly good looking.
It can be kind of frustrating if you didn't grow up thinking of yourself as entitled to chicks and have been reading all of the community stuff... girls turn to you, do all the work and then you go home with them. It just happens and you didn't do anything
Well, this is kind of unfair, learning to let it happen was a pretty big piece.
BTw, how are the demographics in your town? I see you are svensk.. Not only many nordic girls are way more pro-active but they do also have pretty bad demographics... That may affect their behaviour.
(09-22-2011 05:49 PM)Brian Wrote: [ -> ]Honestly, most of your friends or people you know will say that you're hot. The only way to find out is to post your picture on hotornot.
If you're around 9.0+ then you're consider "above average". If you're 9.9 then your'e hot. Hotornot doesnt lie...it's a bunch of stranger rating you. There's no sugarcoat. and yes, the game is different for those guys who score higher.
Namely, escalate faster and lead.
Never heard from any friends Im hot, eh well maybe from some female friend, but thats about it.
Ive tried hot or not, I got 9.5
I guess the only true way to know whether you're really good looking is just female feedback....
Have you ever been approached,
have you had women telling you you're hot, have them touching your pecs, touching your face, buying you drinks, waiting to talk to you after class, paying the bill for you.....
those things. But even if these things havn't happenned to you don't make the mistake of thinking that you're not good looking. Whathever you don't do that!!! That's what firstaidkit said when she ment hot or really really good looking.
But it seems that you must be good looking.
Seems like this is quite a trend among community people, not really knowing the value that they already possess.